Some kids are happy to learn by doing. These are the ones for whom “practise makes perfect”. Some might call them kinesthetic learners. Others learn differently, developing a blueprint for even kinesthetic skills internally before trying things out. Their learning is no better or worse or more efficient or less; it’s just harder to see and therefore harder for parents to believe in.
I used to worry that my daughter would never learn that practise makes perfect, since I never see her stick with something that is hard. But you know what? She learns just fine anyway. It’s just that her “practise” is internal, where I can’t see her struggling with it. I just have to believe it’s happening and it is!
I remember when Emily was younger and I watched her playing with a shape sorter,you know the square ones with different shaped holes and lots of different shapes inside,she had a go at fitting the shapes with no success and then decided not to do it any longer.She didn't get frustrated, it was simply as if she knew she couldn't do it and didn't need to waste her time on it and she put it to one side and went on to something else.
We always had a load of toys out on the floor for us to play with and now and again I would introduce it into our play but she would ignore it. One day she went over to it and put the shapes in quickly, with very little effort.She was pleased with herself and her new found ability at that moment but rarely felt the need to give it another go, it was as if that process had been learnt and she just moved on to something else.Over the years this pattern has repeated itself so many times in so many ways.I don't see her working things out or persisting when something is hard.She jumps from one stage to another with no apparent learning curve.
Autonomous education suits Emily just fine,she is in charge and she knows what she needs and where she needs to be.The things she does and the way she does them may not always make sense to me and I have to be honest and say I would dearly love some external evidence of a process at times,however based on the evidence over the last 9 1/2 years I trust that she will learn all she needs to know in her own inimitable way