A LIFE WORTH LIVING....: What a day....

Wednesday, 22 October 2008

What a day....

We went off to the cinema this morning to Watch WallE.Bit of a shock to the system to be up and out at 9.00 as the film was showing at the ungodly hour of 10.00!!
Milly had been saying last night she wasn't wanting to go and I had said that I thought she would enjoy it when we got there.Anyhow I half expected her to refuse to go this morning,luckily she didn't and we really enjoyed the film.I cried!!

She didn't want to go to home ed group afterwards though:-( I am finding her refusal to go places really hard to take.I know the group is mainly boys and that she really isn't always keen to join in the war games!!She isn't the type to go and just join in and you don't always get "invited" into a game. She refuses to travel to another group to see if we can find more girls to play with.She doesn't want to join any other clubs or groups and I think I would find it easier to accept if I felt she was really happy.She has a couple of good girl friends and we try to see them regularly but I know she would love to see them more, that would be easy for us but they have different schedules!!I suppose from her point of view it isn't more friends she needs but more time with the friends she has.It's an old problem that keeps reoccurring, usually when I am feeling S**t.

To top the day off I have just got back from picking Alan up from accident and emergency.

Emily and I had been in a shower to wash hair and I came down to make a cuppa and realised Alan was late.Just as I began to rack my fuddled brain if he had told me he was on late call tonight the phone went,Alan asked if I could get in the car and bring the camera,he was just on the outskirts of the village.At first I thought he had seen something spectacular he wanted to show Emily and I and to have a photo(silly woman!!!!)He went on to say he had come off his scooter, he was OK but needed to take photos. We jumped in the car and headed off to find him.As he had been coming up the hill into the village a tractor had pulled out of a field,Alan had had to put his brakes on to go round the front and because there was mud on the road he skidded and flipped over and ended up in the hedge!! Luckily a guy who lives in the village was coming up after him and he and the farmer helped him up.It was the guy from the village that suggested taking photo's of the mud on the road and the fact there were no signs warning motorists.

The farmer had said he would get a truck to move the bike for us.When we got there Al was a little shaken but upright although he was hurting all over and particularly his left ankle and wrist.Emily was great,very concerned for him but not upset and kept really calm.After discussing things a while we talked about calling the police so we would have the incident logged.At that point the farmer came with his truck.Alan explained about the police coming and he went off again and said to ring him later.Any how one hour later Emily and I were still sat in our car, in between two police cars with flashing lights,while statements were taken and an ambulance turned up for Al.The machine to clean the road arrived alongside the farmer to pick up the bike.It was a busy place!!Alan then went of to A&E to be checked over,he didn't want us to follow him and have to sit around waiting so we dashed into town to get some chips, Milly was starving and I couldn't face cooking.On the way into town Milly looked at the clock and asked if we would be back in by 6 so she could watch the Simpsons, as it was supposed to be a Halloween special(her and Alan watch it together every night) I had to laugh ;-)

We picked him up around 7.30 ,he is in a lot of pain but luckily just a sprain to his ankle and wrist with bruising along his side, which I am sure will be very colourful tomorrow. He has been fed and in a nice warm bath and nurse Emily has taken him to bed.

Tomorrow we will asses the damage and decide where we go from here.He got the scooter because we couldn't afford to run two cars, but he had an accident last year on black ice and now this.I know accidents can happen in cars, but I don't really want to test out the saying "third time lucky".

7 comments:

stefndawniy said...: ouch, I hope he isn't too bruised.
About the friends thing, we have similar here, there aren't any children near us for Nao to play with, she has a very few good friends and has started making more friends at ballet lessons but it is hard.; 23 October 2008 at 00:18
Sam said...: What an exciting, but not too pleasant evening. I hope he is ok. Good luck with the decision making.
Maybe the friend situation with Emily is only as bad as you feel, *because* you're feeling low. Especially since you feel it is you who should be doing something about it???; 23 October 2008 at 01:01
Shirl said...: Yes, the friends thing can be a problem. I hope Alan gets well soon.; 23 October 2008 at 04:16
Emma said...: Hope Alan is ok and gets well soon.

The friend thing is hard. We are moving back to England soon and one of the reasons for doing so is that the kids haven't any friends here at all. They miss them. Hopefully it'll sort itself out for all of us soon.

Emma
xx; 23 October 2008 at 09:36
Emma said...: Hope Alan is ok and gets well soon.

The friend thing is hard. We are moving back to England soon and one of the reasons for doing so is that the kids haven't any friends here at all. They miss them. Hopefully it'll sort itself out for all of us soon.

Emma
xx; 23 October 2008 at 09:38
Lisa G said...: Oh no what a nasty shock, glad to hear Alan is ok!; 23 October 2008 at 18:16
Grit said...: hope you are all ok now; even with no or very little damage done to body or vehicle, these things can really mess with our heads.; 27 October 2008 at 17:10

This is me.....

There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout: This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.” Stacey Charter.

Why we Home educate

( Slightly edited from a blog post I did when we started out) In the end the actual decision to take Emily out only took a matter of days but before that it had been around a year and a half of talking about ti and reading books, Free range education by Terri Dowty, Educating your child at home by Jane Lowe and Alan Thomas were two that had a real impact for different reasons. Free range education has lots of examples of real life home educators and I think I can say that it was this one that convinced me the most that we could do it. We are two very average people ,neither of us left school with many qualifications, we went on to do quite well in our chosen professions and had no need to think about the education system at all until Emily came along.

I knew about home education and when Emily was born considered it as an optionbut always felt my lack of education would be a problem and that I wouldn't be capable of providing her with what she would need.Looking back with hindsight it is easy to see how wrong I was!!

School never really suited Emily......After the nursery year at a very highly rated, high achieving school we knew that particular School wasn't for us and took her out. We enrolled her in a lovely village school with only 70 children in the whole school .The ethos of the school was totally different, the children didn't wear uniforms and there was much more emphasis on the children being individuals.The head was a sensitive and principled man who wanted the best for the children. We thought we had struck gold.Over the reception and year 1 Emily gained confidence and really started to bloom. It was at this time she was diagnosed with dyspraxia( we had had to go down the diagnosis route as our observations of Emily's difficulties were not enough to enable the teachers to tailor things so she was helped and given less work in class) but she managed quite well in the more relaxed play orientated early years.Year 2 with more emphasis on academic activities got progressively harder for her. She is very sensitive and it wasn't just the academic side it was the embarassment of having to put her hand up for the toilet,seeing others being told off and worrying in case she did something wrong and got the same treatment, panicking because she couldn't do the work and the teacher never had time to sit with her (alot of this did not come out until she had left school) her behaviour at home became worse and worse she was so angry and obviously stressed . At this time we began to seriously consider taking her out but held back because of my lack of confidence in my ability to provide her with an adequate education ,my health being so poor was also a major stumbling block.

Then in year three it became blatantly obvious that something needed to change .She was struggling on all levels and we couldn't allow the school system to damage our daughter anymore.She became ill with a bug that was doing the rounds and she was off for two weeks , during that time I had a conversation with a friend who home educates her two children and I was so upset I couldn't make a decision and she said just go with whats in your heart and that really helped me to shift my thinking and stop worrying about what I couldn't give her and focus on what I could give her.

We never sent her back.I still get emotional when I think of that time , the look on Emily's face when we told her she would never have to go back to school was priceless,the immense sense of relief that we were off the treadmill of school life and the excitement of the time ahead and to be honest the fear of the unknown......

So here we are four years on and a lot of reading and researching later I feel comfortable with what we are doing . The changes that have happened so far have been helped along the way by the many wonderful blogs out there.They are so varied and there are so many different approaches , I have found ones that I can identify with and have read a lot of archive material that has been written in each and found answers to so many of the questions I have had that they have helped me to sort out what will work best for us .As much as I wish we had done this earlier and saved Emily from the distress that she went through I do believe things happen for a reason and that the time was right for us to take her out and that looking on the bright side one of the benefits is that at least she has had a taste of school and now we all know without a doubt that it is not for us !!!!

It is very liberating to be making decisions based on what works best for us as a family and not what society expects.

Let your child be a child.

No child was ever spoiled by too much love.

Be authentic with your child.

Listen openly to your child’s needs.

Believe in your child’s good intentions.

Find the humour.

Look past the behaviour… what is your child feeling?

Have fun with your child today!

“There is no reason why we cannot say ‘No’ to children in just as kind a way as we say ‘Yes’.” - John Holt

“Play is really the work of childhood.” - Fred Rogers

“The best way to make children good is to make them happy.” - Oscar Wilde

Children thrive in a peaceful and loving environment.

A child needs love most when things go wrong.

Children reflect the treatment they receive.

A few qoutes I like....

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in, broadside, thouroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly shouting, 'WOW'.... Beth Moore

The perpetual testing of public school children is like a gardener constantly pulling his plants up by the roots to see if they are growing....(unknown)

Children require guidance and sympathy far more than instuction...Helen Kellers teacher

I hear and I forget I see and I remember I do and I understand...Confusious