"Although I speak from my own experience, I feel that no one has the right to impose his or her beliefs on another person. I will not propose to you that my way is best. The decision is up to you. If you find some point which may be suitable for you, then you can carry out experiments for yourself. If you find that it is off no use, then you can discard it." Dalai Lama...

Monday 24 August 2009

Meet blanky....

Walking upstairs today I saw these familiar threads ,I find them everywhere,an especially large mound is usually found near the sofa. I can sometimes get irritated at the pesky things, especially if I have just vacuumed.Today as I bent to pick them up an image of Emily walking up the stairs clutching an arm full of blanky,scruffy dog,elephant and dummies, sprung up and made me smile.She loves blanky...



This is Blanky,a (once pink) baby blanket that had swaddled a very premature Emily!It goes most places with us.It has been rubbed by a dummy and cuddled to within an inch of it's life.It doesn't get washed.She did let my sister wash it once but she said it took ages for it to "smell" right again:-)




It's also quite useful as a kind of exercise band when watching a movie:-)



We decided a long time ago not to hasten her separation from the things that give her so much comfort and have been surprised at quite how long the love affair has lasted:-)Some have said that we are trying to keep her young by allowing her to continue with them,and we should take them away and let her grow up.I have struggled with this but have come to understand that it is not about us not wanting to cut the strings.In so many other ways Emily acts older than her years,she is not immature and I believe allowing her to have them has in fact allowed her confidence to grow because of the comfort and security she feels from them.This is about honouring Emily's need for her soothers.When she is ready she will let go of blanky and dummies. Eventually scruffy dog,the bestest dog in the world, will spend more time at home.I do get embarrassed sometimes,we get the odd strange look when at the cinema and she is sat with a dummy and blanky but that is much more about me and my concern about what others think of me as a parent than the fact Emily has a dummy or blanky because she is generally unconcerned about what others think(I have asked her if she minds me telling it on here and she said she didn't,she sat on my knee while I read through it for her and as I got to the part about honouring her need she lent in and gave me a really big hug and kiss).I do notice that if we are in the car and are passing children of her age or older she will discreetly lower her dummy and put it on her lap till we pass and she is leaving them at home more often,so she is beginning to separate from them in her own time.

I love blanky too, despite the threads ;-) because it is part of Emily.While she still gets comfort from it I will keep on holding it in my bag for her when we are out,trying to find my purse through the tangle of material that was once a blanket,I take responsibility and ensure it always comes home from whatever outing we have been on and I will carry on picking up threads numerous times a day:-)

6 comments:

Deb said...

Oh I love blanky too, and the fact that Emily still has it! I remember very clearly the feeling of utter betrayal when my mother gave some of my toys to a jumble sale without telling me, because she thought I should have grown out of them. I still can't quite forgive her!

You are absolutely right to let her keep blanky for as long as she wants - what possible harm can it do? :) xxx

Unschoolers Rock the Campground said...

This makes me so happy. To see a child honored so.

My sister saved all the pieces of her daughter's "my my" in a little wooden box on her bureau. So, even though the blankey was no more, pieces of it are still there to remember.

Lovely ;-)

sue said...

Oh, my daughter who is nearly 16 loves her babbit, he has never been washed as he just wouldnt smell right, we love lu with all our heart so we love (smelly) babbit too lol.
Your daughter is obviously so happy and content :)
By the way, what a wonderful blog :)
x

Michelle said...

C has yellow blanky. Not allowed to just call him blanky. Oh and never to be referred to as "it". Yellow blanky is a he. He does come out of the house but piggy and poley stay home all the time as the fear of losing them was greater than the need to have them. It was always her choice - though influenced by me pointing out lost loves on pavements and in shops.

Classroomfree said...

Such a lovely posting to read - thank you!

Ruth said...

My nearly 11 son has a blanky he has had since a baby and takes it to bed with him. He doesn't take it out anymore but we couldn't go away without it.