A LIFE WORTH LIVING....: Wednesday....

Wednesday 13 October 2010

Wednesday....

We were due to go to Home ed group meet today. I woke to my phone alarm going off and promptly fell asleep again - I woke again and dragged myself out of bed to wake Milly.

She had been very active yesterday - I had my monthly meditation meet in the morning and she played with my friends two boys.My friend who was hosting this month has the most idyllic property.Stunning views over the lake district - land with a tree house,swings and land to wander on.Plus the added attraction of animals:-)They had a great time for a couple of hours and we had a great meditation!!

We got home at lunchtime and my Mum and Dad came to visit.I went food shopping.Milly then walked Beauty with Alan before the two of them went to the park in Cockermouth to climb and play a new dare game they had started last week.Lot's of opportunity for running jumping and climbing - unfortunately on this occasion an opportunity to bang her head on the climbing frame... Lot's of tears and home for a snuggle with me before tea and then a bath and bed.

I woke her gently and asked if she wanted to go - she didn't and turned over to go back to sleep - I got back into bed and did the same:-)

A slow chilled day followed .Milly watched TV and then putered for a while before heading up to listen to a story tape - I had very recently bought Skellig and suggested that might be good to listen to - she wasn't at all keen . She took a library one up she had listened to before. She came down after a while -couldn't really get into the story again.I suggested the Skellig audio book again and she reluctantly took it upstairs . She came down for lunch and asked if we could watch the DVD (alongside the audio tape I had also bought the DVD and a book called My name is Mina) and she asked if we could also start the felt Bat we had talked about making last week.

As she waited for me to finish off the last bit of paperwork before going to start the bat, she picked up My Name is Mina off my desk and sat on the chair near me and began to read it.Some of you will be aware of our journey and the fact Milly doesn't read much- she adores stories ,we read to her and she listens to lots of audio books - if asked she would say she can't read very well and it gives her a headache.We don't do lessons here and she never *has* to read or do spelling tests.She reads websites,magazines,researches things when she needs to - never pages and pages but little and often...

She very quickly got into the story and identified with the main character (One of the reasons I got the book when I read a review on a blog was the fact I could see Emily in the description of the girl ) - she read snippets to me ( word perfectly ) and read a chapter in very little time. We talked about the character and I was enthusiastic and interested .I was sooooo happy to see her reading and was tempted to say something and praise her...but resisted - I didn't want to make it into a big thing and put any pressure on her at all . If she continued to read it, fabulous, if she didn't I would continue to read it to her as I would normally do...

The book has been carried around with her all day and has been dipped in to at times. It may be *the* book that she reads in full and realises that she *can* actually do it.If not - no problem things will carry on as before.

We spent time together cutting out the pattern and felt for the Bat and then watched the DVD of Skellig (very enjoyable film and since watching it she been listening to the audio book ) whilst I sewed it together.Apparently we need another adult bat and a family of babies so I am going to be very busy.

2 comments:

Michelle said...: How funny, I bought both books this week after a friend was doing the school open days and went into an English class where they were discussing Skellig and the teacher was asking the children how they thought HE would be (not at all positive). My friend HE's her daughter A and A was muttering "not true", "not true" to all the negative comments and discussion taking place, such that in the end the teacher heard and A gave a little talk on what HE actually means and took questions! I decided if schools are going to use Skellig for propaganda purposes I should probably read it too, then looking on Amazon, saw there was the prequel so bought that too. Not started reading them yet.; 14 October 2010 at 18:31
Lynn said...: Heard about My name is Mina as a positive book about home ed on a thread somewhere.Thought it would appeal to Emily when I read the review. I am looking forward to reading it after her or with her whichever way it happens ;-)

Good on A - educating the school on home ed - I like it:-); 14 October 2010 at 21:30

This is me.....

There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout: This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.” Stacey Charter.

Why we Home educate

( Slightly edited from a blog post I did when we started out) In the end the actual decision to take Emily out only took a matter of days but before that it had been around a year and a half of talking about ti and reading books, Free range education by Terri Dowty, Educating your child at home by Jane Lowe and Alan Thomas were two that had a real impact for different reasons. Free range education has lots of examples of real life home educators and I think I can say that it was this one that convinced me the most that we could do it. We are two very average people ,neither of us left school with many qualifications, we went on to do quite well in our chosen professions and had no need to think about the education system at all until Emily came along.

I knew about home education and when Emily was born considered it as an optionbut always felt my lack of education would be a problem and that I wouldn't be capable of providing her with what she would need.Looking back with hindsight it is easy to see how wrong I was!!

School never really suited Emily......After the nursery year at a very highly rated, high achieving school we knew that particular School wasn't for us and took her out. We enrolled her in a lovely village school with only 70 children in the whole school .The ethos of the school was totally different, the children didn't wear uniforms and there was much more emphasis on the children being individuals.The head was a sensitive and principled man who wanted the best for the children. We thought we had struck gold.Over the reception and year 1 Emily gained confidence and really started to bloom. It was at this time she was diagnosed with dyspraxia( we had had to go down the diagnosis route as our observations of Emily's difficulties were not enough to enable the teachers to tailor things so she was helped and given less work in class) but she managed quite well in the more relaxed play orientated early years.Year 2 with more emphasis on academic activities got progressively harder for her. She is very sensitive and it wasn't just the academic side it was the embarassment of having to put her hand up for the toilet,seeing others being told off and worrying in case she did something wrong and got the same treatment, panicking because she couldn't do the work and the teacher never had time to sit with her (alot of this did not come out until she had left school) her behaviour at home became worse and worse she was so angry and obviously stressed . At this time we began to seriously consider taking her out but held back because of my lack of confidence in my ability to provide her with an adequate education ,my health being so poor was also a major stumbling block.

Then in year three it became blatantly obvious that something needed to change .She was struggling on all levels and we couldn't allow the school system to damage our daughter anymore.She became ill with a bug that was doing the rounds and she was off for two weeks , during that time I had a conversation with a friend who home educates her two children and I was so upset I couldn't make a decision and she said just go with whats in your heart and that really helped me to shift my thinking and stop worrying about what I couldn't give her and focus on what I could give her.

We never sent her back.I still get emotional when I think of that time , the look on Emily's face when we told her she would never have to go back to school was priceless,the immense sense of relief that we were off the treadmill of school life and the excitement of the time ahead and to be honest the fear of the unknown......

So here we are four years on and a lot of reading and researching later I feel comfortable with what we are doing . The changes that have happened so far have been helped along the way by the many wonderful blogs out there.They are so varied and there are so many different approaches , I have found ones that I can identify with and have read a lot of archive material that has been written in each and found answers to so many of the questions I have had that they have helped me to sort out what will work best for us .As much as I wish we had done this earlier and saved Emily from the distress that she went through I do believe things happen for a reason and that the time was right for us to take her out and that looking on the bright side one of the benefits is that at least she has had a taste of school and now we all know without a doubt that it is not for us !!!!

It is very liberating to be making decisions based on what works best for us as a family and not what society expects.

Let your child be a child.

No child was ever spoiled by too much love.

Be authentic with your child.

Listen openly to your child’s needs.

Believe in your child’s good intentions.

Find the humour.

Look past the behaviour… what is your child feeling?

Have fun with your child today!

“There is no reason why we cannot say ‘No’ to children in just as kind a way as we say ‘Yes’.” - John Holt

“Play is really the work of childhood.” - Fred Rogers

“The best way to make children good is to make them happy.” - Oscar Wilde

Children thrive in a peaceful and loving environment.

A child needs love most when things go wrong.

Children reflect the treatment they receive.

A few qoutes I like....

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in, broadside, thouroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly shouting, 'WOW'.... Beth Moore

The perpetual testing of public school children is like a gardener constantly pulling his plants up by the roots to see if they are growing....(unknown)

Children require guidance and sympathy far more than instuction...Helen Kellers teacher

I hear and I forget I see and I remember I do and I understand...Confusious