A LIFE WORTH LIVING....: Blogging thoughts....

Wednesday, 5 March 2008

Blogging thoughts....

I was thinking today of when I first started this blog.
I had read so many and the idea to do my own had immense appeal when Emily suggested we should start one.I had no clue at all how to set it up but spent ages learning,to be honest it was quite exciting to be learning something new,yes my life is that sad that setting up a blog is exciting:-)

I knew nothing about blog safety apart from the very basics and didn't find too much info when I did a quick search on google.I decided against using nick names, mainly because I am so absent minded I knew I would use our real names without realising anyway.

I also didn't think about whether there was any kind of blog etiquette and whether I should ask people before I put a link to their blog on, that only just crossed my mind the other week.If there is an unwritten rule and I have broken it I do apologise!!

Over the last month or so I have stopped reading as many blogs about unschooling,mainly because I now feel more confident with what we are doing and don't feel the need for the validation I got from reading about other unschooling families.I have a small group of blogs I visit regularly and they give me all I need,some of them aren't following an autonomous route but they are families I met early on in my blog reading and for various reasons I have become attached to them,not in a scary stalker type way you understand:-)

I do wonder how long I will keep this up for.I have got used to sitting here most evenings thinking things through and recording our days.I enjoy sharing what we do and don't see reason to stop any time soon.I have enjoyed "meeting" other families through their blogs and have thoroughly enjoyed having people drop by and comment on here.

All in all this has been a wonderful tool to work through any issues I have had and it has been a great way to record our journey from school to freedom.I am looking forward to writing about what our "education" looks like in the coming months.As the year has gone on I have realised that just as the school system of one size fits all does not work, neither does one method of home education.You must do what feels right for you and yours.

10 comments:

Stacie said...: I'm glad you started your blog,and that I met you! Your blog is honestly one of my favorites, because you post so regularly and you are very straightforward and honest. And it's simple. Just recording your days and your thoughts. I like seeing how other people live and think. Oh, and there are the funny British quips that I enjoy!

I am glad you continue to read my blog, even though I am not really an unschooler. Just a mom trying to find her way and do her best by her son.

You are right, there is so much diversity in the world of homeschoolers. And as in all areas of life, I feel it is best to be open-minded and tolerant, even if our approaches are different.

I hope you blog forever!; 5 March 2008 at 22:16
Michelle said...: You scared me there! I thought you were going to say that you have decided not to continue blogging!

I dither about our openness and that we probably are really quite easily tracked down should someone wish. Some people password their blogs but I gained so much from reading other people's in the early days that I feel I should have it available for others to read.

It's also lovely when cyber friends become in-real-life friends. You'd be very welcome to stay with us should you want to come down south :-); 5 March 2008 at 22:45
Lynn said...: Thank you so much Stacie, that's very kind:))
I intend to keep on for the foreseeable future as I get so much out of doing it.xx; 5 March 2008 at 22:46
Lynn said...: Michelle,
Things have changed so much since I started this Blog(has it only been 3 months!!!) and I suppose I was just assessing where I had come from and where I want it to go in the future.
I too want to be accessible for the same reasons as you.I also couldn't do it without being as honest or as open as I have been because it is by doing that that I have worked through my muddled thinking.
So I will carry on with my regular ramblings about life with my gorgeous,funny,loving,complex,cheeky,try the patience of a saint,darling daughter:)

Thank you so much for the offer to stay with you and you never know I may just take you up on it:))xxx; 5 March 2008 at 23:20
rupestur said...: I heart your blog. I'm subscribed on Bloglines and it's awesome to see this daily record on unschooling. I am not sure if I ever commented here, but I read daily!

I had a dream as a little girl about another girl who I'd never met, and her name was Milly. Very fun dreamland pal! :D Makes me happy to see your Milly becoming herself!; 6 March 2008 at 03:32
Lynn said...: Hi heather,
lovely to "speak" to you.Lovely story about your dream. I have always thought Milly was a special girl(well I am biased) and I like to think that through this blog about her growth she is touching the lives of many we may never meet.Thank you for your support.It has been an incredible three months when I think back to how wound up and stressed I was about "unschooling" to where I am now. I really don't think I would have made the transistion as quickly without doing this Blog.Obviously having the comments was just the best thing but also just giving myself the time to format my chaotic thoughts to enable others to make sense of what was going on has been of immense value.With Chronic fatigue you are mentally and emotionally tired as well as pyhsically and sometimes it takes a while to just unscramble things and put it into words and I know I would have dificulty expressing myself in a real situation without the advantage of cut and paste and lot's of time!!!!!
Your story has kept me coming back for more too..XX; 6 March 2008 at 08:18
piscesgrrl said...: I, too, thought perhaps you were going to say you're taking a break. That would make me sad, but I'd also understand as that's what I'm contemplating myself. (Notice I'm not posting much right now.) I agree it's been an amazing tool for dissecting thoughts, and feedback from others is wonderful - not to mention the online friendships. Makes me less lonely out here in the cornfields!; 6 March 2008 at 15:22
Lynn said...: I have noticed you had not been as productive.Is it due to your writing commitments?
I miss you when you don't post I love your mix of humour and insight into unschooling.
I hope you find a solution that suits you.But the blogospere would be a duller place without you:)xx; 6 March 2008 at 16:40
Grit said...: i've probably broken blog rules too. oh dear! i enjoy your blog and hope you continue. and i don't often comment when i've crept around, and will try to do better to say hi and thanks!; 6 March 2008 at 23:15
Lynn said...: Grit,
thanks for that.Please do let me know when you have been around.

Commenting is a funny thing isn't it?
I don't often do it and it has usually been when something has really touched me or struck a chord when I have read something on a blog.Then once I have come out and am no longer what I have heard called a lurker(sounds dreadful!!)it somehow gets easier to "talk" to that stranger:)))
By the way I am interested to know if you ever saw that young man again?xxx; 7 March 2008 at 07:26

This is me.....

There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout: This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.” Stacey Charter.

Why we Home educate

( Slightly edited from a blog post I did when we started out) In the end the actual decision to take Emily out only took a matter of days but before that it had been around a year and a half of talking about ti and reading books, Free range education by Terri Dowty, Educating your child at home by Jane Lowe and Alan Thomas were two that had a real impact for different reasons. Free range education has lots of examples of real life home educators and I think I can say that it was this one that convinced me the most that we could do it. We are two very average people ,neither of us left school with many qualifications, we went on to do quite well in our chosen professions and had no need to think about the education system at all until Emily came along.

I knew about home education and when Emily was born considered it as an optionbut always felt my lack of education would be a problem and that I wouldn't be capable of providing her with what she would need.Looking back with hindsight it is easy to see how wrong I was!!

School never really suited Emily......After the nursery year at a very highly rated, high achieving school we knew that particular School wasn't for us and took her out. We enrolled her in a lovely village school with only 70 children in the whole school .The ethos of the school was totally different, the children didn't wear uniforms and there was much more emphasis on the children being individuals.The head was a sensitive and principled man who wanted the best for the children. We thought we had struck gold.Over the reception and year 1 Emily gained confidence and really started to bloom. It was at this time she was diagnosed with dyspraxia( we had had to go down the diagnosis route as our observations of Emily's difficulties were not enough to enable the teachers to tailor things so she was helped and given less work in class) but she managed quite well in the more relaxed play orientated early years.Year 2 with more emphasis on academic activities got progressively harder for her. She is very sensitive and it wasn't just the academic side it was the embarassment of having to put her hand up for the toilet,seeing others being told off and worrying in case she did something wrong and got the same treatment, panicking because she couldn't do the work and the teacher never had time to sit with her (alot of this did not come out until she had left school) her behaviour at home became worse and worse she was so angry and obviously stressed . At this time we began to seriously consider taking her out but held back because of my lack of confidence in my ability to provide her with an adequate education ,my health being so poor was also a major stumbling block.

Then in year three it became blatantly obvious that something needed to change .She was struggling on all levels and we couldn't allow the school system to damage our daughter anymore.She became ill with a bug that was doing the rounds and she was off for two weeks , during that time I had a conversation with a friend who home educates her two children and I was so upset I couldn't make a decision and she said just go with whats in your heart and that really helped me to shift my thinking and stop worrying about what I couldn't give her and focus on what I could give her.

We never sent her back.I still get emotional when I think of that time , the look on Emily's face when we told her she would never have to go back to school was priceless,the immense sense of relief that we were off the treadmill of school life and the excitement of the time ahead and to be honest the fear of the unknown......

So here we are four years on and a lot of reading and researching later I feel comfortable with what we are doing . The changes that have happened so far have been helped along the way by the many wonderful blogs out there.They are so varied and there are so many different approaches , I have found ones that I can identify with and have read a lot of archive material that has been written in each and found answers to so many of the questions I have had that they have helped me to sort out what will work best for us .As much as I wish we had done this earlier and saved Emily from the distress that she went through I do believe things happen for a reason and that the time was right for us to take her out and that looking on the bright side one of the benefits is that at least she has had a taste of school and now we all know without a doubt that it is not for us !!!!

It is very liberating to be making decisions based on what works best for us as a family and not what society expects.

Let your child be a child.

No child was ever spoiled by too much love.

Be authentic with your child.

Listen openly to your child’s needs.

Believe in your child’s good intentions.

Find the humour.

Look past the behaviour… what is your child feeling?

Have fun with your child today!

“There is no reason why we cannot say ‘No’ to children in just as kind a way as we say ‘Yes’.” - John Holt

“Play is really the work of childhood.” - Fred Rogers

“The best way to make children good is to make them happy.” - Oscar Wilde

Children thrive in a peaceful and loving environment.

A child needs love most when things go wrong.

Children reflect the treatment they receive.

A few qoutes I like....

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in, broadside, thouroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly shouting, 'WOW'.... Beth Moore

The perpetual testing of public school children is like a gardener constantly pulling his plants up by the roots to see if they are growing....(unknown)

Children require guidance and sympathy far more than instuction...Helen Kellers teacher

I hear and I forget I see and I remember I do and I understand...Confusious