A LIFE WORTH LIVING....: Harbour walks and party prep.

Wednesday, 13 February 2008

Harbour walks and party prep.

Yesterday we had a very lazy morning, Emily was listening to a story CD and I was pottering ,I couldn't be bothered to do anything and really didn't feel like going out but I am so glad we did. We had a great afternoon out with friends at the local aquarium .We had lunch then went in to what was a very busy aquarium.I usually much prefer to go when the schools are off but we coped!!! Then it was on to the big play park and as we were all leaving Emily asked if we could walk around the harbour so we said our goodbyes and had a lovely walk in the sunshine watching the fishing boats and Milly was chatting away. We got talking about our one year anniversary (Home Ed) and I asked what she would like for a gift to mark it and had expected her to ask for a soft toy but after thinking for a short while she said she would like a mouse,a live one!!! Well all the way round the harbour she talked about the mouse, it was named and a cage was filled with all the things it would need. She would save up all her money to buy the things needed and she would look after it herself. Now this is where it all sounds so familiar, first the Rabbit ,then the cat, then the dog, now the mouse!! I wasn't sure the man who appears to get left with most of the looking after would be willing to add another animal to the menagerie,however she took this on the chin and said she would prove to him she would take a larger part in looking after them and then he could decide if she could have one.We are going to try and find someone who actually has a mouse as I have a feeling if she sees one she may change her mind....

Today Milly was supposed to be tidying her bedroom floor ready to get two mattresses down for the sleepover. She did a little whilst I got on with something else and then we ended up falling out yet again about it.Won't bore you with the details suffice to say one day I will handle things better!!!

We made up and headed off shopping and things between us were much better we had a great time looking for things for the party bags and then went off for lunch at Mcdonalds, not usually a choice she makes but the free gift was a small dog toy hence the attraction.Then off food shopping. Back home to fill party bags and then she had a good bounce with Al on the trampoline.It is good now the weather is getting better,last year she spent hours and hours bouncing and playing on the trampoline and climbing frame. My favourite thing was when she made them into a wagon complete with reigns and covered area for the back of the wagon,Little house on the praire was being read at the time....

It is going to be a long night for us tomorrow. I have got them some face packs and coloured hair mouse and glitter spray and they are going to have a pamper session and get glammed up. Alan is setting up a surprise disco in the dining room and we have a heart theme obviously.So lots of heart lights and confetti with love heart sweets ,plus a disco ball.Should be good fun for them as they can use the Cd player but also U Tube on the PC, so a good range of music for them.I hope they tire themselves out and get to bed at a reasonable hour, although I would say the chances are slim!!!!

7 comments:

Stacie said...: Listening to Emily's dreams and schemes makes me think so much of myself when I was her age. It makes me imagine what it would be like to have a girl with interests similar to mine. Levi is so different from me.

Was she born on Valentines Day?

Hope you are able to sleep tomorrow night!; 13 February 2008 at 22:47
stefndawniy said...: sounds as if they will have a lovely time :o); 14 February 2008 at 17:44
Lynn said...: Hi Stacie,
Yes our Em is definitely a dreamer,
I do understand how difficult it can be when your child has different interests or ways of doing things.I am quite practical and ordered and the way Emily does things is so far the other way!!!I would prefer to write my story's down but Emily acts hers out and although I enjoy it, I do find it hard to keep it going as long as she would wish.. I also think that being together 24/7 and being their main playmate can sometimes magnify those differences. It seems from reading your blog you and Levi are beginning to find a lot of common ground, I do understand this can feel as though we have to put our own needs off and can be frustrating.As time has gone on I am finding a way to fit in what I want to do whilst ensuring I am available for Emily, and my husband has helped in enabling me to have time, while they do "stuff" together.It has taken a year to get to where we are and there is still a way to go so that I can feel my needs are being met as well.I think our children are sent (or choose to come to us) to teach us things, and in my case one of the many things she has done for me is that(on a good day) I have learnt to let go of my need for order and to live more in the moment.I hope this helps in some way to know you are not alone.
She was born on 16th feb.
We did get some sleep!!
I will post about it later on.; 15 February 2008 at 12:44
Lynn said...: Dawny,thanks for dropping by. They did have a lovely time if somewhat rowdy!! I had to be a party pooper at 2.15 and tell them to turn the lights out but they told me this morning they were still awake till 3.30 listening to the sounds of the house and imagining ghosts???; 15 February 2008 at 12:48
Stacie said...: "As time has gone on I am finding a way to fit in what I want to do whilst ensuring I am available for Emily."

That is what I am working towards. My husband is willing to help when I ask, he just doesn't always see the need until I say something. Must be an oblivious man thing. So I just need to make my needs known to him, and then he is more than willing to see that they are met.

Thanks for your support. And yes, Levi and I are finding common ground. It just doesn't come naturally. But we get on just fine, no personality conflicts. Just have to work on allowing our interests to co-exist.

My b-day is Feb. 26th - just 10 days after Emily's. No wonder I can see a kindred in her.; 16 February 2008 at 01:16
Lynn said...: Stacie,
you will find a way to get your time,it is a similar thing here maybe it is a man thing,I just have to say and Al will accomodate.I have had to accept that he is not a mind reader!!!!

Does that birthday make you an aquarian too??

I have just read the lovely comment your Mum left on your last post you are a lucky woman to have her in your corner.XXXX; 16 February 2008 at 20:05
Stacie said...: No, I'm a pisces, but i have a lot of aquarian traits. I love personality profiles and sun/moon signs.; 16 February 2008 at 20:34

This is me.....

There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout: This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision.When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.” Stacey Charter.

Why we Home educate

( Slightly edited from a blog post I did when we started out) In the end the actual decision to take Emily out only took a matter of days but before that it had been around a year and a half of talking about ti and reading books, Free range education by Terri Dowty, Educating your child at home by Jane Lowe and Alan Thomas were two that had a real impact for different reasons. Free range education has lots of examples of real life home educators and I think I can say that it was this one that convinced me the most that we could do it. We are two very average people ,neither of us left school with many qualifications, we went on to do quite well in our chosen professions and had no need to think about the education system at all until Emily came along.

I knew about home education and when Emily was born considered it as an optionbut always felt my lack of education would be a problem and that I wouldn't be capable of providing her with what she would need.Looking back with hindsight it is easy to see how wrong I was!!

School never really suited Emily......After the nursery year at a very highly rated, high achieving school we knew that particular School wasn't for us and took her out. We enrolled her in a lovely village school with only 70 children in the whole school .The ethos of the school was totally different, the children didn't wear uniforms and there was much more emphasis on the children being individuals.The head was a sensitive and principled man who wanted the best for the children. We thought we had struck gold.Over the reception and year 1 Emily gained confidence and really started to bloom. It was at this time she was diagnosed with dyspraxia( we had had to go down the diagnosis route as our observations of Emily's difficulties were not enough to enable the teachers to tailor things so she was helped and given less work in class) but she managed quite well in the more relaxed play orientated early years.Year 2 with more emphasis on academic activities got progressively harder for her. She is very sensitive and it wasn't just the academic side it was the embarassment of having to put her hand up for the toilet,seeing others being told off and worrying in case she did something wrong and got the same treatment, panicking because she couldn't do the work and the teacher never had time to sit with her (alot of this did not come out until she had left school) her behaviour at home became worse and worse she was so angry and obviously stressed . At this time we began to seriously consider taking her out but held back because of my lack of confidence in my ability to provide her with an adequate education ,my health being so poor was also a major stumbling block.

Then in year three it became blatantly obvious that something needed to change .She was struggling on all levels and we couldn't allow the school system to damage our daughter anymore.She became ill with a bug that was doing the rounds and she was off for two weeks , during that time I had a conversation with a friend who home educates her two children and I was so upset I couldn't make a decision and she said just go with whats in your heart and that really helped me to shift my thinking and stop worrying about what I couldn't give her and focus on what I could give her.

We never sent her back.I still get emotional when I think of that time , the look on Emily's face when we told her she would never have to go back to school was priceless,the immense sense of relief that we were off the treadmill of school life and the excitement of the time ahead and to be honest the fear of the unknown......

So here we are four years on and a lot of reading and researching later I feel comfortable with what we are doing . The changes that have happened so far have been helped along the way by the many wonderful blogs out there.They are so varied and there are so many different approaches , I have found ones that I can identify with and have read a lot of archive material that has been written in each and found answers to so many of the questions I have had that they have helped me to sort out what will work best for us .As much as I wish we had done this earlier and saved Emily from the distress that she went through I do believe things happen for a reason and that the time was right for us to take her out and that looking on the bright side one of the benefits is that at least she has had a taste of school and now we all know without a doubt that it is not for us !!!!

It is very liberating to be making decisions based on what works best for us as a family and not what society expects.

Let your child be a child.

No child was ever spoiled by too much love.

Be authentic with your child.

Listen openly to your child’s needs.

Believe in your child’s good intentions.

Find the humour.

Look past the behaviour… what is your child feeling?

Have fun with your child today!

“There is no reason why we cannot say ‘No’ to children in just as kind a way as we say ‘Yes’.” - John Holt

“Play is really the work of childhood.” - Fred Rogers

“The best way to make children good is to make them happy.” - Oscar Wilde

Children thrive in a peaceful and loving environment.

A child needs love most when things go wrong.

Children reflect the treatment they receive.

A few qoutes I like....

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in, broadside, thouroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly shouting, 'WOW'.... Beth Moore

The perpetual testing of public school children is like a gardener constantly pulling his plants up by the roots to see if they are growing....(unknown)

Children require guidance and sympathy far more than instuction...Helen Kellers teacher

I hear and I forget I see and I remember I do and I understand...Confusious